Design and technology major work

I finally handed in my major work today. After months of having thread and pins scattered in every room of the house i am so happy to no longer wake up on the kitchen floor caressing my a3 paper blanket. I don't think you could imagine the amount of thread that i come across on a day to day basis, and I'm not going to lie, one time i found some in my underpants. Eh.

So after two long nights of energy drinks, no-doz and homemade video clips I finally finished my portfolio.

Here is some deep paragraph I wrote. Eh it is basically my soul. Design is something i wish to pursue so yea. bam. 

“Today’s society is drowning in the ever-changing idea of what is “cool” and what is perceived as “acceptable”. Consumerism lurks everywhere, in your home, on your Internet, on your Television, on your street and even on you, as you parade around branded by what you wear. This consumerist monster tells you what to put on in the morning, it tells you where to buy it. Flicking through your Frankie magazine you think you are deciding what you want. Trends only last 1-2 weeks, you watch the Money fly out of your Anna Sui wallet. Individualism is unattainable, even by not conforming to mainstream fashion you are conforming to those whom too choose not to follow conventional style. You may think you make your own decisions, but you don’t.
The solution to this manifestation of uncreative souls? My design, you”

Jessica Guzman

Design brief:

“Design and market an economic autumn collection for women that challenges conventional fashion and encourages eccentricity, individualism and life experience”

Motivation for ideas:

After investigating the reasons behind the growing trend of op shopping, thought to be because of the financial recession, it was discovered that some consumers no longer want to conform to mainstream fashion, but are slowly beginning to uncover the possibilities of alternative style. This emerging market motivated the idea of “untied”. Furthermore, societies growing addiction with self-image is affecting women mentally, physically and socially all around the world. The opportunity to let women self-express through fashion regardless of their socio-economic status was my motivation.

Crotchet collars

Tied-dye chiffon blouse

Silk high wasited box pleated shorts

Satin box pleats skirt

Rosettes on skirt are removable

Butter seude corset

All outfits (excluding socks and shoes) were designed and produced by myself. 

Cognitive time travel.

Okay i look way too happy for my own good.

Varsity Jacket: ASOS

Pants: Minas cupboard

Shirt: General Pants

Belt: ASOS

Shoes: Leather Air Forces (cause this bitch gonna shank you)

Shitty hair job: Your own fault Jessica

My life = BON IVER BON IVER BON IVER + trashy Dubstep

DON'T YOU JUST WANT TO EAT HER!!!!

Kiss of death

One teaspoon. 

So not only does the name of this amazing dress remind me of the dementors in Harry Potter, but I am head over heels in love (excuse the tacky cliche).  So I fell in love with this dress last year, I tried it on, and was like JIZZ JIZZ JIZZ. Then a couple weeks later it sold out. BAM. Life is destroyed. 

BUT I JUST FOUND IT ONLINE. Cyber JIZZ JIZZ JIZZ!! 

So in the couple weeks I have been hibernating, here is "what's new" in order of priority. 

1. A dog ran into the school. I chased after it for a while

2. Got myself one fine looking boyfriend. :)

3. I got out of detention by playing the "I had to use the year 7 toilets because period was trickling down my leg" card, and making the male teacher feel uber uncomfortable. 

4. Finally got my Varsity jacket. Oh yeah. 

5. Realised that babey apparently doesn't have an e. 

Attempted to cut a front fringe, got up to cutting a strand, then chickened out. Now I look like Elvis.   

6. Organised a "Wear your school jumper backwards day" at school. 

7. Finally got the "Sex talk" in the car on the way to school. Mum is pretty smart, she knew I wouldn't have the balls to jump from a moving vehicle. 

7. Apparently some "Osama" character died? Yeah. not important.

 Done and Done

Sycamore tree

F L I P P E D

Some of us get dipped in flat, some in satin, some in gloss; but every once in a while, you find someone who's iridescent, and once you do, nothing will ever compare. 

So a friend recommended me this movie last year, and it is seriously absolutely amazing. I thought it was pretty old until i saw it at the movie shop as "new release". I know "cool story bro", but it is seriously is so adorable/artistic/heart warming/holy shit excuse me while i squeeze this teddy bear to death because this movie is so good/and yup...I just peed a little.

check it out. Or you can just check me out. That's cool too.

My love burns for you like a dying phoenix.

Harry Potter actually makes my day. 

Half yearlies are over, but trials are creeping closer and closer. Damn you trials.

My life since my last post has been pretty ordinary. Met some lovely new people whom are lovely, finally booked schoolies, and am driving to get my hours up. 10 more days and i am 17.

I don't think anyone can comprehend how long i have waited to turn 17. (durhhh 17 years brah) but it is more of an emotional waiting. (HSC is making you crazy you crazy south american)

okay. Stop there. I am actually voice overing myself. It is time for bed.

So this is what i wore to a lebanese wedding not realising that lebanese people are muslim and wear things that cover up their lady bits. Awkward to say the least. 

So for me procrastination comes in the form of dying my hair. So you could imagine what my hair looks like after 2 weeks of intense exam period. If you have no imagination. Look up and note the skunk like lined hair. 

Dress: Mina's year 11 cruise dress
Shoes: K-mart
Lace socks: Forever new

Day 3. ESH.

troll. troll. troll.

So i have not kept to the daily posting, what are you going to do about it. Poke me on facebok? yeah that's right you can't cause i deactivated it. oh yeah. In all honesty, my lack of fb stalking has resulted in countless instagram posts, followed by the deletion of those posts, cause i don't want people to think i am addicted and have no real life. 

In the last three days i have:

1. Cleaned my room once more

2. Done some homework

3. Gone to my work meeting at gloria Jeans (was asked back by boss for the holidays) even though I haven't worked in a very long time, I got free curry pizza. Don't be jealous. 

4. Been a ruthless/hardcore/sick bastard after I got stung by a bee and didn't even react like a crazy child. If you are unaware I am shit scared of all kinds of insects. Here goes my anecdote: So some bee decides to sneak into my sock and it's all, "hey foot, come at me", then my foots all like "Black and yellow, Black and yellow" then it proceeded to sting me with its arse. But you know it died so, i got my revenge.

5. Went to my hot friends 18th. 

6. My grandma gave me a night gown, personally i think it is a snuggie. I have worn it out 3 times in public already

7. Bought my first maxi skirt. $2 from vinnies sale

8. Went to my friends surprise 17th.

9. Decided to skip easter cause easter eggs are gross. 

wow. i have been pretty fun these last couple of day. Guess the forthcoming term will esh my head up so I guess granting myself some freedom isn't the worst thing.

Here are some fun photo's taken by my very attractive friend TIFFANY!

Self dye.

ZE CAKE!

Making Harry Potter masks out of maccas trays in the car (Y)

The best friend <3

Our new shoes!

Pretty damn self explanatory. 

Coolest glasses in the world.

Casual stalker photos. Note: naked people in foreground.

Tiff & Minkens

Belt: K-mart

Dress: V & M Australia

Boots: Rubi

Sunnies: not mine :(

Red snuggie: Grandma

It makes me angry that my font is not black. It is grey. 

Day two.

Those boots that I previously mentioned. The ones that the were completely obliterated. YUP. my Grandma got them fixed by who I assume was some seedy italian man who smelt of meatballs. But I must admit, i quite enjoy how they now squeak, have superman grip and shine like a bold mans head. YES

Boots: Some shop in Paddy's. 

Almost two year old boots made new by seedy italian man. YES

note: Punchline anyone?

Why did professor Snape stand in the middle of the road?

So no one could tell what side he was on! WHATT UPP

I would like to note, the plug casually chilling in the corner was unintentional. I am not some douche who is attempting to be artsy. 

Day one.

And i begin the "What the shit are you wearing" x 30 challenge.

While i do so, i will tell you of another challenge. DT. Design and technology major project is posing a major problem. The freedom is incredibly intimidating. My lack of math ability is a serious disadvantage, and i am going to have to claim defeat to all those years of bickering from maths teachers saying that it is actually applicable in life. Holy shit. Took me a solid hour of long thinking to determine the circumference, radius, diameter and width of each pleat for my skirt. But i did it. The pattern is finally done!

YIPEEEEEEE

  

Skirt: Mum made it for my sisters jazz concert from the 80's
Belt: kmart
Bag: My friends grandmas.... oops
Shirt: Mums
Trench coat: ASOS
Boots: Rubi shoes

Challenge accepted.

Life after exam week is good.

Spending my days playing COD, researching tips on how to be better at COD, watching and re-watching Harry Potter, researching Harry Potter jokes all while eating 2 minute noodles with melted cheese.

You know you have to find something more eventful to do when the waxing lady, who's attempting to disfigure your eyebrows, asks "what you are doing tonight" and you say "organise my books", followed by silence.

I have neglected this blog, and as such, I have decided to take on a challenge, that i set myself, I like to call it

"What the shit are you wearing" x 30

I will outfit post for 30 days consequently. If I miss a day, you can trust me that I will provoke my alter ego to push me down the stairs. (fight club reference)

With that. Here is Natalie with community Channel.

She is so so so so so funny + She hasn't uploaded for 2 weeks so lets start a mini riot. RAHAHAHHAHAHAHHHAHA

My favourite 

My fun Harry Potter joke:

Why did professor Snape stand in the middle of the road?

Punchline will be posted tomorrow dudes!!

Mustard + Machinery

**use of alliteration

I am currently obsessed with mustard. And when I say obsessed, I mean the kind of obsessed that could put someone away for a very long time...

So this obsession started when I wanted to buy a simple mustard dress, just plain jane. Something comfortable and boring. But couldn't find anything anywhere. I found dresses the colour of shit, I found dresses that looked like shit, and I found dresses that smelt like shit. But no mustard :(

Then it came to me (like that one time an apple fell on some Newton kids head) i imagine my epiphany was much more dramatic. I was all like, let's put my new JANOME OVERLOCKER 744D into good use and make me some mustard coloured shit. So I did.

So there I was just sitting on the living room floor trying to understand the works of "pattern making", sipping on my Peach ice tea ( i inhale peach Ice tea like coffee) and getting stabbed countless times by pins. AHHH. And after 7 episodes of "How i met your mother" a little fb stalking and pointless dancing.

My overlocker finally conceived its first.

Here it is.

**Triumphant music plays

This is my nephew, I swear it's not some random kid

Vest: 80's vest, found in the depths of my cupboard

Scarf: Mina Kitsos

Dress: Jessica Guzman

Shoes: Rubi

So i would like to end this post by revealing, yes, the rumours are true. I am currently dating a bearded lizard. Heres some snap shots of our first date <3

Intimate moment calls for some tacky editing

bahahah.... he's so naughty

Bazza the lizard and his mate woody.

NOTE: LIZARD WAS NOT HURT, PHYSICALLY OR EMOTIONALLY <3

The post dedicated to Jesus in coat form.

Prepare your eyes for heaven. You know that cold breeze that hits yours face when you walk into west fields. You know the moment when you bite into your triple cheeseburger and you realise they accidentally put an extra slice of cheese. oh yeah, i know you know that feeling. Here it is.

IN COAT FORM

ASOS: River Island Leopard Trench Coat

Leopard print trench coat by River island, in a single breasted cut with a rounded shirt style collar, a button through front, a full flared skirt with pockets and a contrasting belt with pin buckle fastening to the front.

$126 later this bitch is mine!! HURRY UP DELIVERY WOMAN!! (cause clearly thats a woman's job)