Design and technology major work

I finally handed in my major work today. After months of having thread and pins scattered in every room of the house i am so happy to no longer wake up on the kitchen floor caressing my a3 paper blanket. I don't think you could imagine the amount of thread that i come across on a day to day basis, and I'm not going to lie, one time i found some in my underpants. Eh.

So after two long nights of energy drinks, no-doz and homemade video clips I finally finished my portfolio.

Here is some deep paragraph I wrote. Eh it is basically my soul. Design is something i wish to pursue so yea. bam. 

“Today’s society is drowning in the ever-changing idea of what is “cool” and what is perceived as “acceptable”. Consumerism lurks everywhere, in your home, on your Internet, on your Television, on your street and even on you, as you parade around branded by what you wear. This consumerist monster tells you what to put on in the morning, it tells you where to buy it. Flicking through your Frankie magazine you think you are deciding what you want. Trends only last 1-2 weeks, you watch the Money fly out of your Anna Sui wallet. Individualism is unattainable, even by not conforming to mainstream fashion you are conforming to those whom too choose not to follow conventional style. You may think you make your own decisions, but you don’t.
The solution to this manifestation of uncreative souls? My design, you”

Jessica Guzman

Design brief:

“Design and market an economic autumn collection for women that challenges conventional fashion and encourages eccentricity, individualism and life experience”

Motivation for ideas:

After investigating the reasons behind the growing trend of op shopping, thought to be because of the financial recession, it was discovered that some consumers no longer want to conform to mainstream fashion, but are slowly beginning to uncover the possibilities of alternative style. This emerging market motivated the idea of “untied”. Furthermore, societies growing addiction with self-image is affecting women mentally, physically and socially all around the world. The opportunity to let women self-express through fashion regardless of their socio-economic status was my motivation.

Crotchet collars

Tied-dye chiffon blouse

Silk high wasited box pleated shorts

Satin box pleats skirt

Rosettes on skirt are removable

Butter seude corset

All outfits (excluding socks and shoes) were designed and produced by myself. 

Kiss of death

One teaspoon. 

So not only does the name of this amazing dress remind me of the dementors in Harry Potter, but I am head over heels in love (excuse the tacky cliche).  So I fell in love with this dress last year, I tried it on, and was like JIZZ JIZZ JIZZ. Then a couple weeks later it sold out. BAM. Life is destroyed. 

BUT I JUST FOUND IT ONLINE. Cyber JIZZ JIZZ JIZZ!! 

So in the couple weeks I have been hibernating, here is "what's new" in order of priority. 

1. A dog ran into the school. I chased after it for a while

2. Got myself one fine looking boyfriend. :)

3. I got out of detention by playing the "I had to use the year 7 toilets because period was trickling down my leg" card, and making the male teacher feel uber uncomfortable. 

4. Finally got my Varsity jacket. Oh yeah. 

5. Realised that babey apparently doesn't have an e. 

Attempted to cut a front fringe, got up to cutting a strand, then chickened out. Now I look like Elvis.   

6. Organised a "Wear your school jumper backwards day" at school. 

7. Finally got the "Sex talk" in the car on the way to school. Mum is pretty smart, she knew I wouldn't have the balls to jump from a moving vehicle. 

7. Apparently some "Osama" character died? Yeah. not important.

 Done and Done

Day 3. ESH.

troll. troll. troll.

So i have not kept to the daily posting, what are you going to do about it. Poke me on facebok? yeah that's right you can't cause i deactivated it. oh yeah. In all honesty, my lack of fb stalking has resulted in countless instagram posts, followed by the deletion of those posts, cause i don't want people to think i am addicted and have no real life. 

In the last three days i have:

1. Cleaned my room once more

2. Done some homework

3. Gone to my work meeting at gloria Jeans (was asked back by boss for the holidays) even though I haven't worked in a very long time, I got free curry pizza. Don't be jealous. 

4. Been a ruthless/hardcore/sick bastard after I got stung by a bee and didn't even react like a crazy child. If you are unaware I am shit scared of all kinds of insects. Here goes my anecdote: So some bee decides to sneak into my sock and it's all, "hey foot, come at me", then my foots all like "Black and yellow, Black and yellow" then it proceeded to sting me with its arse. But you know it died so, i got my revenge.

5. Went to my hot friends 18th. 

6. My grandma gave me a night gown, personally i think it is a snuggie. I have worn it out 3 times in public already

7. Bought my first maxi skirt. $2 from vinnies sale

8. Went to my friends surprise 17th.

9. Decided to skip easter cause easter eggs are gross. 

wow. i have been pretty fun these last couple of day. Guess the forthcoming term will esh my head up so I guess granting myself some freedom isn't the worst thing.

Here are some fun photo's taken by my very attractive friend TIFFANY!

Self dye.

ZE CAKE!

Making Harry Potter masks out of maccas trays in the car (Y)

The best friend <3

Our new shoes!

Pretty damn self explanatory. 

Coolest glasses in the world.

Casual stalker photos. Note: naked people in foreground.

Tiff & Minkens

Belt: K-mart

Dress: V & M Australia

Boots: Rubi

Sunnies: not mine :(

Red snuggie: Grandma

It makes me angry that my font is not black. It is grey. 

Mustard + Machinery

**use of alliteration

I am currently obsessed with mustard. And when I say obsessed, I mean the kind of obsessed that could put someone away for a very long time...

So this obsession started when I wanted to buy a simple mustard dress, just plain jane. Something comfortable and boring. But couldn't find anything anywhere. I found dresses the colour of shit, I found dresses that looked like shit, and I found dresses that smelt like shit. But no mustard :(

Then it came to me (like that one time an apple fell on some Newton kids head) i imagine my epiphany was much more dramatic. I was all like, let's put my new JANOME OVERLOCKER 744D into good use and make me some mustard coloured shit. So I did.

So there I was just sitting on the living room floor trying to understand the works of "pattern making", sipping on my Peach ice tea ( i inhale peach Ice tea like coffee) and getting stabbed countless times by pins. AHHH. And after 7 episodes of "How i met your mother" a little fb stalking and pointless dancing.

My overlocker finally conceived its first.

Here it is.

**Triumphant music plays

This is my nephew, I swear it's not some random kid

Vest: 80's vest, found in the depths of my cupboard

Scarf: Mina Kitsos

Dress: Jessica Guzman

Shoes: Rubi

So i would like to end this post by revealing, yes, the rumours are true. I am currently dating a bearded lizard. Heres some snap shots of our first date <3

Intimate moment calls for some tacky editing

bahahah.... he's so naughty

Bazza the lizard and his mate woody.

NOTE: LIZARD WAS NOT HURT, PHYSICALLY OR EMOTIONALLY <3

What do you give a train driver for Christmas ? Platform shoes !

Christmas has come and gone. Massive sad face.

In my household we partake in christmas festivities on christmas eve.

Massive dinners, watching my 19 year old sister peek at her presents, then re-wrap them and awkward conversations with my family about how you should watch out for white striped spiders, because they EAT YOUR FLESH AWAY AND YOU WILL DIE. My family's fun aren't they. Once again my mum pressured me into playing christmas carols on my violin, and my mum once again played my dance concert DVD so i could relive my slutty experiences.

Do do do do do do

Presents you ask?

Not the subscription but the 6th issue of Fallen magazine.

FALLEN magazine is dedicated to discovering and supporting Australian creatives, and strives to confirm their importance within the arts in a global context.

Seeking the inspiring and inspired, FALLEN is an agency for the collection of talents, trends, tangibles, traditions and thoughts.

Foals album, Total life forever

You must listen to "Spanish Sahara", makes me JIZZ. Sounds a little like temper trap, well i think.

Book: The pact by Jodi Picoult

According to wiki it is:

In the end it is revealed that Emily's death wasn't really part of a suicide pact; Emily asked Chris to kill her because she couldn't do it herself. Chris tried to talk Emily out of it but pointed the gun to her head in the end to bring her out of h

er misery. Emily placed her hand on the trigger, over his.

Sounds fun.

Some fancy eyelashes.

I also acquired: MONEY, a wifi router

(even though i have one)

with a foreign powerpoint, beeswax cream, cream, bubble bath shizz (cause baths are x1000000 better than showers + odd bits and bobs.

Merry christmas to all :)

My new virtual home.

My name is Jess Guzman. Im 16 (wishing i was 17). I like the colour black, but not in the emo sense. I'm from Argentina and i speak moderately fluent spanish. I like things i'm not good at. My grammar, punctuation and spelling is atrocious. I like to dance. I play the violin. My room is painted pink, i wish it wasn't. I like to draw. I like computers. I love making awkward silences extra awkward. I can not keep secrets. I like knowing things that others don't, then telling them to reiterate the point that they didn't know. I love my iphone. I love inhaling too much ventolin (asthmatic) so my hands start to shake. I'm a horrible organiser. I always make mistakes. Being grossed out by period. Once i didn't pick up my dirty clothes from the floor for a week, i witnessed a cockroach emerging amidst the pile not too long after. I use ; because i think it looks cooler than : I love fake laughing, because its clearly more fun than not. I would love to one day me a designer, whether its fashion, communication or graphic. I love being a wierdo sometimes. I have too many out of body experiences. I am obsessed with gossip girl and have my own "gossip update". I bought a hip top phone and pretended to be blair. Sometimes my eye twitches way too often, i get a little freaked out. I am intimidated by nearly everyone around me, but i try not to be. I am in love with half-casts. I hate it when girls have to make the first move. Giving birth to tampons. I secretly tried the moves from karate kid in the mirror.

Thats about it. You officially know everything there is to know about me. Well at least for now :) I shall be posting anything i like; from photographs, poems, jewellery, outfits, songs.

And I'm off bed.