Mustard + Machinery

**use of alliteration

I am currently obsessed with mustard. And when I say obsessed, I mean the kind of obsessed that could put someone away for a very long time...

So this obsession started when I wanted to buy a simple mustard dress, just plain jane. Something comfortable and boring. But couldn't find anything anywhere. I found dresses the colour of shit, I found dresses that looked like shit, and I found dresses that smelt like shit. But no mustard :(

Then it came to me (like that one time an apple fell on some Newton kids head) i imagine my epiphany was much more dramatic. I was all like, let's put my new JANOME OVERLOCKER 744D into good use and make me some mustard coloured shit. So I did.

So there I was just sitting on the living room floor trying to understand the works of "pattern making", sipping on my Peach ice tea ( i inhale peach Ice tea like coffee) and getting stabbed countless times by pins. AHHH. And after 7 episodes of "How i met your mother" a little fb stalking and pointless dancing.

My overlocker finally conceived its first.

Here it is.

**Triumphant music plays

This is my nephew, I swear it's not some random kid

Vest: 80's vest, found in the depths of my cupboard

Scarf: Mina Kitsos

Dress: Jessica Guzman

Shoes: Rubi

So i would like to end this post by revealing, yes, the rumours are true. I am currently dating a bearded lizard. Heres some snap shots of our first date <3

Intimate moment calls for some tacky editing

bahahah.... he's so naughty

Bazza the lizard and his mate woody.

NOTE: LIZARD WAS NOT HURT, PHYSICALLY OR EMOTIONALLY <3

The post dedicated to Jesus in coat form.

Prepare your eyes for heaven. You know that cold breeze that hits yours face when you walk into west fields. You know the moment when you bite into your triple cheeseburger and you realise they accidentally put an extra slice of cheese. oh yeah, i know you know that feeling. Here it is.

IN COAT FORM

ASOS: River Island Leopard Trench Coat

Leopard print trench coat by River island, in a single breasted cut with a rounded shirt style collar, a button through front, a full flared skirt with pockets and a contrasting belt with pin buckle fastening to the front.

$126 later this bitch is mine!! HURRY UP DELIVERY WOMAN!! (cause clearly thats a woman's job)

One short day, in the Emerald city!

Year 12 muck up photos essentially is the first letter carved into your school gravestone. Yes a little somber, i know. But my friends and i were determined to "out cool" last years efforts, and we surely did.

Initial idea: Dress up as; cones, traffic lights, road lines and road kill, following the theme of "We stop traffic". I kid you not, we almost made fools out of ourselves.

Final Idea: Dress like the characters and inanimate objects featured in Wizard of Oz.

I obviously being the originator of this phenomenal idea. **does inappropriate thrusting followed by fist pumps.

From left to right

(Scarecrow: Melon, Toto: Krisna, Obscure fairy: Rachel, Tin man: ME, Lion:Mina, Dorothy:Alley, Anne: Munchkin, Witch: Amy, The yellow brick road: Candice)

Tin man costume

Silver sparkly singlet: Hand me down

Hat: Salad bowl

Tin arms and legs: Woolies aluminium foil

Cool shoulder pads: Candice's craftsmanship

brb

going to find the wizard.